Are Dogs Eager to Please People?

Are dogs eager to please? This topic sometimes brings up disagreement among people. It’s often stated as if it’s a fact, but it’s slightly complicated because people mean different things when they make this comment.

In general the answer is no, dogs are not living their lives trying to please people. If they were, we wouldn’t need to train and motivate them to do behaviors we find desirable. Dogs do their natural dog behaviors, which commonly conflict with living with people. For example, dogs jump up and put their feet on our bodies to try to lick our faces (greeting by licking other dogs’ faces/mouths is a normal dog behavior), or they chew objects that we don’t want them to (everything can be a chew toy for dogs), or they bark, or they relieve themselves on soft carpets, or dig the carpet and destroy it.

I do think dogs do kind behaviors towards people, though, like come over and lick us to say “thank you” for a meal/treat, or snuggle or sit next to us if we are not feeling well, but there’s not necessarily evidence to prove dogs form representations of our internal states, or that this is primarily driving their behaviors. And that is okay. It doesn’t make dogs any less valuable to us as companions.

The eager to please idea is usually used to justify the expectation that dogs should just do behaviors we want them to for no other reason. And if they don’t, then they need punishment. It also assumes dogs even know what we want at all times. This isn’t true though. It’s not how training works. We have to provide appropriate motivation and rewards to encourage dogs to perform behaviors we want them to do. They are not going to do actions just to please us. And dogs that are behaving in ways that conflict with what we want, don’t need punishment. They just need normal positive reinforcement training to teach them what to do.

A dog is not going to perform a 30-second down-stay because he’s thinking it will make you happy. That’s just not reality. But we can gradually teach a dog to do this behavior for reinforcement (rewards).